Finding joy

I am on a mission. A mission to stop complaining about what is or can’t be, but the find joy and happiness in all the moments that fill my days, which in turn make up my life. I have a tendency to sigh and moan about the life I have and to look forward to another season in my life. Instead of enjoying this moment. Therefore I am going to try to live in this moment, to find joy in this day however long it may be.

There are a lot of things to be happy about.

Last week I went shopping with Abel and I didn’t have a coin for the cart. So I went in to look for a person, to change change with. The first person I spoke to didn’t have any, but she did look in her purse for a very long time because she was a very friendly sort of lady. The next ladies I went to had something better. A plastic coin from Food Lion that you can re-use. They were endeared by Abel. And they probably thought I was very pretty and nice.

Monday I went to the store by myself. I’m doing […]

What I learned when I went to study nursing

? After we moved back to Belgium and we weren’t mennonites anymore ?and pretended to be normal (whatever that is. As far as I know there are no normal people)… I started going to school.

And I do really mean an actual school. A real one. Where there are also other people. Everywhere. I had dreamed of being a nurse for so long that I ran to it very quickly when I heard I could start there without a Belgian high school diploma. And then when I stood in front of the school door I felt very much like screaming very hard and running back to my mama.

But I was super brave, so I went inside. To a class full of people who had started school the day before and who all stared at me. I came in with another girl who was also a day late, so I felt a connection with her. Quite logical seeing as we were both starting a day late. Can’t you feel the unity and the connection in the air?

Then the teacher sent her out because apparently the class was split in two for this class and her last name started with […]

Fighting and Living

Inevitable stays the fact that I always fight. A chronic adolescent, I sometimes call myself. I fight against life. Against the time. Against prejudices and traditions, manners and conventions.

Fighting can be rebelling. Fighting is also life. We fight against sickness and death, against the human in us and against nature. It’s a fine line between this fighting and this living..

God gives and takes life. Still, we give our utmost and go to the ends to keep life when it seems to end or when the going is rough. We think it’s wrong to let it go just like that. And it is. It’s something oh so special. How then can we know what to fight for and what to accept in peace?

We fight, have to fight, against human sins. Against jealousy, hate, anger, that in us which always wants to get our own rights, and will hurt others if need be, to get that. We have to fight for life, for all that is beautiful, true and pure.

And we have to do the fighting in a state of rest. Lay ourselves down in our Father’s hands, in trust. While also running the […]