We had a very busy weekend a few weeks ago. We were gone all day, at a crowded place where the children could not nap properly. I ran after our tired, sweaty little boys, trying to eat some food of my plate that I carried around, while other adults were sitting down and eating their food in glorious ease. Usually, I feel quite sorry for myself on occasions such as this.
However, to my surprise I was contented and patient! As this does not come naturally to me at all, it shocked me more then a little.
I explained to myself that it must be because I had put my mind to it. I had prepared myself that it would be unlikely that I could sit at the table for longer then 5 minutes. And so I was ok with it being so!
I continued in this very agreeable train of thought for several minutes. But then a gentle nudging disturbed me.
I had the impression that God was trying to tell me something. He spoke quietly, persistantly to my heart until I understood: I had nothing whatsoever to do with this patience. He had given […]
The book ‘Christy’ ends with ”The joy of the children was in his face.’
I often think of that sentence when Abel laughs. He is so full of glee, overjoyed with life, he really has ‘the joy of the children’. ?He makes me think of all those bible verses that talk of joy and of children: being like a child and letting the children come. I look at Abel’s huge grin when I pick him up from school or when he gets the juice he so longed for. Like nothing bad can ever happen again. And think I should be more like him. Full of joy, anticipation, surpise and glee at what life brings.
This morning he sat on my lap and we sang ‘Old McDonald had a farm’ a zillion times. With every imaginable animal included. His smile was delicious and his hugs unexpected. We read book after book and were cozy and snug.
It was life, and it was good. And I was exactly where God wanted me at that moment, doing what He gave me to do.
I found lots of little joys.
I’m learning to let go of schedules and lists and to trust […]
Screaming and yelling, the boys welcome papa home. They waited on him all day long. From the moment he stepped out the door, with them standing in front of the window, howling. They thought their life was as tragic as anything.
After we built a very high tower with the duplo blocks, and the oldest could kick it down, they decided that life was worth living after all.
Gabriel still naps in the morning. After that, I promised Abel, we can go see Izaak. His face becomes a smile. A beaming, grinning, mischieveous smile. According to him, baby is all done sleeping now. I say he’s not. 5 minutes later, baby is really done sleeping, Abel informs me. But mama does not agree with him.
We make a train, a pile of pillows to jump in, empty the toy boxes with the cars and baby toys, we draw Abel’s hand and get the mail, and we eat raisins. Then, we hear a noise coming from upstairs. We run up the stairs and the noise becomes a cry. The cry turns into a laugh soon enough, when mama […]
It’s gray and rainy and children are teething and get sick.
Sometimes you have to look hard and long before you find joy. Sometimes you don’t find it for awhile and you forget yesterday. Sometimes you have to sit and stare and drink another cup of tea.
But it really is true: ‘Joy comes in the morning’. And there is never, ever a moment in which we can not hope on God. In the rain and through the crying we can hope on Him.
Everytime again He sends comfort, and His smile. Not always the same way; always different. You have to look for it, search. Open wide and receive it.
Finding a hat that was lost, visitors that clean windows and bring tulips, an hour with baby before the others wake up and kisses for just mama.
God takes care of me. God loves me.
Sometiems I forget it in my head, but my heart always knows it. Sometimes I don’t want it, but I always come running back.
Linking with lisajobaker.com for?Five Minute Writing
The sun is shining and he wants to put on his coat.
I hold his hand and we walk outside, to the sun. The garden is one big mess, but it doesn’t bother him, bless his little heart. He sees leaves and a little bal, sand and an empty little pot. I walk on. He grins.
When I am halfway the garden path, he starts to walk faster. He toddles on towards me, bliss in his little face. Beaming from the sun, who is kindly sharing her light. When we reach the chickens, the little feet stop making steps, and the little hand grasps for the wire fence. It’s rickety, so he can move it to and fro. The chickens come to the fence, hopeful for goodies. The grains that they get are not greeted with much enthusiasm. The apple peels and porridge are a lot better. Maybe they are hoping for some grass, because sometimes there is good stuff like that to be got from that little hand.
The shoes are in the dirty mud, between the path and the wire fence. I pick the little man up and he looks back, at his friends, the […]
I am on a mission. A mission to stop complaining about what is or can’t be, but the find joy and happiness in all the moments that fill my days, which in turn make up my life. I have a tendency to sigh and moan about the life I have and to look forward to another season in my life. Instead of enjoying this moment. Therefore I am going to try to live in this moment, to find joy in this day however long it may be.
There are a lot of things to be happy about.
Last week I went shopping with Abel and I didn’t have a coin for the cart. So I went in to look for a person, to change change with. The first person I spoke to didn’t have any, but she did look in her purse for a very long time because she was a very friendly sort of lady. The next ladies I went to had something better. A plastic coin from Food Lion that you can re-use. They were endeared by Abel. And they probably thought I was very pretty and nice.
Monday I went to the store by myself. I’m doing […]
? After we moved back to Belgium and we weren’t mennonites anymore ?and pretended to be normal (whatever that is. As far as I know there are no normal people)… I started going to school.
And I do really mean an actual school. A real one. Where there are also other people. Everywhere. I had dreamed of being a nurse for so long that I ran to it very quickly when I heard I could start there without a Belgian high school diploma. And then when I stood in front of the school door I felt very much like screaming very hard and running back to my mama.
But I was super brave, so I went inside. To a class full of people who had started school the day before and who all stared at me. I came in with another girl who was also a day late, so I felt a connection with her. Quite logical seeing as we were both starting a day late. Can’t you feel the unity and the connection in the air?
Then the teacher sent her out because apparently the class was split in two for this class and her last name started with […]
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